OD’s Birthday Party Invitation

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Friday 13th

King Gator

OD: The Early Years

I was married at the age of six. It was an arranged marriage and I did not get to meet my bride until the night of the ceremony. The relationship was doomed from the start, as neither of us knew what we were supposed to do on our wedding night.

Soon I realized I was too young to settle down, so I joined a biker gang. I stayed up late, drank a lot of sodas, got hooked on sweets.

By age seven, I was totally out of control. I lived a reckless lifestyle, terrorizing the neighborhood in my go-cart.

Then I met the first true (blonde!) love of my life. Linda Simmons was the daughter of my mother’s friend and her American husband. Our six-year age difference didn’t matter. Neither did our inability to communicate with each other, since she spoke no Spanish and I did not speak English. Our one-week relationship seemed to last a lifetime, but then her father had to return to the U.S. I was told their “vacation” was over. Frankly, I just thought her father didn’t trust me! He had heard about my wild behavior. I never saw her again!

I was heart-broken, but rather than return to my reckless lifestyle, by the age of eight, I found religion and began to clean up my life.